By Camille Brooks
When there is a lack of goal-setting there is usually a lack of peace and joy in our lives as well.
Setting goals helps us reflect on our lives and ask ourself questions. What do we want to become? What brings us peace and joy? What makes us unhappy? What are we worried about? How is the health of our relationships?
Only through personal honesty, prayer and reflection can we discover the holes in our lives through which peace and joy are seeping out.
For example, if I am not feeling well, or live with pain that keeps me from sleeping, this affects the quality of my life. I may still be very happy, but not feeling well creates a little less peace and a little less joy.
Taking the time to investigate why I am not feeling well, and why I am in pain, and then setting goals that could help me find solutions to these nagging concerns, will help restore some of my peace and joy.
This was a true scenario for me a while ago. As I investigated, I found that improving the way I ate would probably help me feel better, and stretching every day might be the secret to becoming pain free.
So, I set a goal to eat less sugar, eat more vegetables and to stretch everyday. Within a short time I was feeling better and completely pain free! I didn’t realize how these physical concerns had nagged at me and stolen some of my peace and joy until after I had set these goals and stuck with them for a while.
Prayerfully asking ourselves good questions, and in essence becoming a detective trying to find out where the holes are, and then setting goals to make changes, really will bring more peace and joy into our lives.
We Set Goals So We Can Live Up To Our Potential
Living up to our potential and progressing is a basic human need. Without progress we cannot feel joy. Progress is joy. If we are stuck in the mire and going nowhere with our personal development; we will stagnate and naturally get depressed.
Goals should challenge us, help us stretch and grow as an individual, and move us forward. As we advance we are transformed into a new and better individual. Our hopes and dreams become reality.
What Areas Should We Set Goals In?
First we need to begin with the end in mind. Goals are not about accomplishing or doing things, they should be about becoming!
At the end of our lives, who do we want to be? What will we regret when we die?
We should begin our goal-setting by beginning with the end in mind. For me, I want to have become more like our Savior Jesus Christ. To do so, I need to follow His example.
The scriptures teach,“Jesus increased in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and man.” Luke 2:52
I love this scripture because it is a pattern for my personal progress. Even the Savior had to set goals and keep increasing and moving forward line upon line, day by day—just like we do.
Following His example and setting goals in four basic areas—spiritual, physical, intellectual, and social—will keep our lives in balance and help us become more like Him. Just like a recipe needs all the ingredients for it to turn out just right, so do our lives need balance between these four areas in order for our lives to turn out just right. If we overemphasize one area, our life will be top heavy and out of balance; the result will be less peace and less joy.
Spiritual
I find the spiritual is the most important area to set goals in. If I have a close relationship with the Lord through daily prayer and studying his words in the scriptures, everything else falls in into place—or out of place because it is not important. I also feel more peace and confidence, even when things don’t go well, this is because connecting with God helps me remember He is watching over me and I can trust Him.
On the other hand, things can fall apart when I haven’t connected with my Father in Heaven at the beginning of each day. I don’t feel that peace and confidence. I worry more, stress, or slip into negative thinking, or succumb to weaknesses more easily.
Mathew 6:33 “But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.”
What do you need added unto you? More understanding or kindness in your marriage? More patience with your children? More self discipline around sugar? Whatever we lack or need more of, it starts with strengthening our relationship with God and exercising faith in Him to help make us better.
What can you do to strengthen your relationship with God?
Social
After aligning our goals with God, our interpersonal relationships should come next. If we are not careful and constantly striving to improve our relationships they will start slipping away, or at a minimum stagnate. David McKay wisely taught, “No success can compensate for failure in the home.”
Let us, nurture our marriage and families. Set goals to serve them through validation, expressions of gratitude, quality conversation, and spending quality time with them in wholesome recreational activities. These are basic needs we all have, thus as we strive to meet the needs of our loved ones, we will also be meeting our own needs and will experience more peace and joy. Ministering is magic; what we give always comes back to us in unexpected ways.
What goal could you set that might fortify your relationships?
Intellectual
It is important that we are always on a learning journey and finding ways to learn new things no matter what our age or stage of life. Our minds were meant to be used. “The glory of God is intelligence.” D&C 98:36. God expects us to use the mind He has given us to grow in light and truth to become more like him.
Our mind is like a muscle; if we don’t use it, we lose it to some degree. When minds are not engaged in learning they become bored, and bored minds gravitate to depression and addictions. An idle mind is the devil’s workshop; nothing good ever came from doing nothing. There will always be a hole in our lives if we are not continuing to learn, we may not even be aware of it, but it is there—draining a little of our peace, a little of our joy.
Let us, set goals to read or listen to books and podcasts, take a class, join a book club, develop a new talent or hobby or ask a neighbor to teach you something they are good at. Last year I asked my neighbor to teach me how to arrange flowers. It was so fun to learn hands-on and visit as we did so. Often, if I don’t know how to do something, I will find someone who does, and ask them to teach me. This is a really fun way to learn, and make great friends. Most of what I have learned in my life I have learned from someone else, and I cannot express enough gratitude to them!
What intellectual goal can you set?
Physical
As I shared in the beginning of this article, not feeling well affects the quality of our lives. Our Heavenly Father loves us and wants us to take care of these wonderful bodies he gave us, so that we might have joy! It makes us happy when we set goals to exercise and eat better, and vice versa; it will steal a little of our happiness if we don’t. Don’t we all want more quality of life?
I find that exercise affects me emotionally, spiritually, socially and intellectually. I have called my exercise time “my ministering time.” This is because I try to go with loved ones and use it as a time to visit. We minister to each other. I have loved to exercise with my husband, children, and friends by going for a walk, run, hike, bike ride, kayaking, or pickle ball. It meets my needs to keep my body healthy, but also meets my needs to socialize, and be stimulated intellectually and spiritually as we have great discussions.
What is one goal you could set that might improve your health and quality of life?
